Samstag, 21. Februar 2015

Strawberry Shoes and Paper Hearts

Hallo lieber Mensch,
der folgende Text ist auf Englisch verfasst, da ich zurzeit viel auf Englisch lese und schaue und höre und generell schon seit einer Weile auf Englisch denke, weshalb es mir manchmal schwerer fällt, meine Gedanken in Deutsch zu verfassen. Ich weiß noch nicht, ob dies eine Ausnahme bleiben wird oder ob ich in Zukunft mehr Dinge auf Englisch verfassen werde, aber das wird die Zeit zeigen. Danke für dein Verständnis, vor allem, wenn Englisch nicht deine Lieblingssprache ist.

Today I saw a girl wearing shoes painted like strawberries while I was walking through the grocery store, listening to The Swell Season and thinking about life. I do that a lot these days. Thinking about the general meaning of life, about my life in particular, who I want to be, what I want to do, what life means to me and what it means to be a girl, a daughter, a sister, an aunt. Well, I was listening to The Swell Season, who, when you give it a closer look, make pretty sad music and I kept thinking how hard it is to be happy in this cruel world and how I struggle to accept the things I can't change. But in this moment, I smiled at myself because I realized something important: I am going to be okay. You see, it's those little moments in your everyday life that keep you sane and scream at you that life is awesome, even if there's so much hate and killing and war going on. And it's necessary to see those moments, to absorb them, to let them heal you. Because life IS great and our world is amazing and there is so much left to see and to learn and to feel and this won't go away because there are people out there, who only think of revenge and might and money. And it's believing in those little moments that will save you. Moments like your two and a half year old nephew grabbing the paper hearts you just made and telling you he wants them on his door. Moments like a 90 year old woman telling you and your friend about her life, just because you stood next to her looking at paintings in a shop window. Moments like unwinding with your mom after you've had a rough time talking to her because of a silly argument. Moments like carrying the newborn son of a friend through a bookstore and telling him how important the Harry Potter series is, although he doesn't understand anything I say.
I kind of lost this mindset in the last months, maybe because I let everything that's happened around the world into my heart, let it feast there and eat parts of my heart for dinner. I just feel so miserable knowing that there are so many people who are being mistreated, hated, hurt and killed and sometimes I don't know how I can stand living on this earth anymore. I often think it would be easier to find another planet and raise a new kind of human beings who don't do such awful things. And then, directly following the thought about emigration, there comes another one saying that all the people who lived until now made so many wonderful things happen and I can't leave it all behind. So I decide to stay. Yes, partly because there's no other planet to live on right now, not in this dimension. I guess we all just need to do our best while living our lives and be kind to one another. Because in the end that's what shapes ourselves, our surroundings and the next generations. Like the Dalai Lama said: "The planet does not need more successful people. The planet desperately needs more peacemakers, healers, restorers, storytellers and lovers of all kind." So I urge you, as I urge myself, to be one or all of those things, to be kind, to live your life being happy and to know that despite everything that's happened to you and the world around you, you're going to be okay.
♥ Regenschirmtier